Sup3rnality

My mother and I were talking a while before we both went asleep, my father was out on rukun tetangga duty. We were laughing at the antics of our cat Hitam who was busy making himself comfortable on my mother's blanket; a guest who invited himself into the room and chose a spot without waiting for anyone's approval. And as we laughed, the subject of the story moved to a former companion of mine, Sawadikap, or Kap for short.

This year marks five years since his death, and yet talking about him still brings me to tears. I was saying how I don't believe in entirety the research that says cats are only affectionate to their owners as that is a survival instinct to ensure a steady supply of food. To some cats, maybe; but not cats like my Kap.

He was stalwart and true, a knight of a cat that never backed down from what he took to be his responsibility. His every-morning wake up calls at my bedroom door, escorting me downstairs and to my bus, his waiting at the gate for me to come home, walking me to my tuition teacher's house...all that and more. He was my companion, my friend, my protector...

My mother told me he waited everyday in front of the house on weekdays for me to come back from school; eventhough I was already in UIA by then...

And before he died, eventhough he was all bones and weak and almost lifeless, he waited for me...for weeks... And when I finally came back and called out to him, he came. He was waiting for me just one last time... He lifted himself up one last time to walk to me. And he never got up again once he collapsed in my arms. I held him for hours until the early morning's light, when he drifted away as his blue eyes bore into mine...

Sometimes, like tonight, as I cry at his memory, I think he's still waiting for me...

I miss him so much it hurts.

Love,
Hazlin