another not so mild obsession
3 weeks ago
Showing posts with label Aust-B. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Aust-B. Show all posts
Friday, May 14, 2010
These last few weeks
I haven't been in the right frame of mind to talk about the things that have been happening for the past few weeks. Everytime I begin to attempt typing out my thoughts, I am stunted by my inability to write and/or put them into words. So here's what I've been doing these past few weeks
- I left WKESP officially on the 29th of April 2010. More specifically, I left Aust-B. I had a very very long cry, not being able to believe I won't be walking into that office again and see them each day. They gave me hugs, which made me cry harder and they all had a procession for me, walking me to the door, for one last time. Leaving them feels like letting go of family. But the best thing about family is that, they're always there for you. I'm halting any entries about leabving WK at the moment until I can sort out my thoughts and feelings.
- I moved out of Cyberjaya on the 30th of April. Ash did most of the job. I packed everything up and he loaded it into the van we borrowed from my uncle. Then we drove to PJ and he unloaded the van for me. I couldn't have done it without him (thanks Sayang). And of course, thanks to my family, too. Who helped me carry the second round of stuff. Yes, I have that much stuff...mostly books and clothes.
- Starting on May 3rd, I am now an employee of the Star. To be specific, a sub-editor for the Star. The Star newspaper that I've been reading daily. Feels almost like a dream. It's different here, but I like it. Work-wise, I do feel very much more accomplished than how I felt in WK.
- I'm now living in PJ. Around the Tropicana area to be more precise. No, not next to Tropicana City Mall like people keep asking. It's near the Tropicana Golf Resort. The condo is called Bayu Puteri Tropicana. It's quite a nice place. House is a bit of a fixer-upper due to an irresponsible landlord, but I'll manage.
- Did I mention my working hours are from 4pm to 12am daily? Uhh, yeah, I start work at 4pm and leave for home around 12am. Wonderful hours for me, cos that's when I work best. And it's not like I have a nightlife anyway, so it's no problem for me. I get to see Ash in the daytime and spend more waking hours with him especially since now I live about 15 minutes away from him and not 50 minutes like when I was in Cyberjaya.
- I'm still getting used to my new area, new job, new schedule, new house...alot of things are still on my mind. But all in all, I'm feeling content right now; like things are falling into place, just need a few things sorted before they can fit even better.
Linzy
- Tags apartment, Aust-B, colleagues, cyberjaya, emotions, family, fire, friends, housemates, occasions, people, wkesp, work
- (0) Comments
Monday, April 26, 2010
Exodus
It's only days until I say goodbye to Wolters Kluwer for good. Only hours, in fact. Since if I were to offset my annual leave balance, I'd only have 3 hours and 45 minutes left to be in the office.
But I'm far from done.
And part of me wonders whether I'll ever be done here.
And part of me wonders whether I'll ever be done here.
Mostly because I'm leaving with a couple of unfinished business. Review for one, I never passed. Which is also the main reason I'm taking my leave to go. My self-esteem can take no more confidence bashing; I'm tired of coming home crying. I'm not a crier, I hate feeling weak, and having done so so much in this past year has eaten at my sense of self. I look in the mirror and I cannot recognize myself. I no longer see the confident, self-assured achiever I once was. It's really time to move on, before I yield and become a nervous wreck who apologizes for everything and cannot hold my own.
And not having passed the review system also means I never got confirmed. With the Third Reich ruling, I don't know how safe I'll be. I just don't want to be around when they decide that I'm not that much of an asset and gas me dead...
I feel there is much to accomplish here still, and the proud person in me hates being mediocre. But the window of opportunity opened up, and this bird wants to fly before the fan is switched on.
Despite all that, my exiting through those glass doors for real is not made painful by not conquering the hurdles put before me, but having to leave some wonderful people I've come to know.
My team, my Australia B, the one which I was put into when I came into this company, have been the people who have held me up even when I was down. Their camaraderie, their bond, their wit and good humour, the friendship...makes for a good good family. And it is like leaving family, the knowledge that I will be bowing out, and leaving the crowd. It feels like saying goodbye when you're about to depart to some distant country, not knowing when you will be back, if ever; and whether things will be the same when you meet again.
I will miss this Team. Even now, when I've been placed in another team, it is still to them I go to have a good laugh. It is to them I go to share some stories or scoop or gossip. It is to them I go to spend my last few days here in WK. Maryann, Arvind, Azeem, Saiful, David, Helen, Ling Ling, Carol and Yian Suan; thanks for hanging out with me these past few days...following me to the Cafe for some tea and a Wii session, and to Al-Baraka. And of course Aravind, Alan, Tham, Sivanes, Adrian, Nubly, Zul and Siew Choo, too. And also, thanks to my former Team Leader, Lin, for hiring me. Thanks for the neverending laughs and lots of memorable spam mail and team chats. All those made my days simply wonderful.
It is difficult to find the words to say goodbye when you just can't bring yourself to say it. And that you know that it ain't gonna be forever. We'll meet again, insyaallah. It's just that this chapter will now be closed, and a new one is on the verge of beginning. And I'm scared, for this "family" will not be there as I step forward. They'll be a memory on which I'll fondly lean on, and I hope it'll give me strength.
So dear Aust-B, it's been a pleasure. I'll try to hold back the tears, and hold my head high. Until we meet again.
Love,
Linzy, the Woman 'On Top'
P/s: To whom does my rotan go to? :p
- Tags Aust-B, colleagues, emotions, family, friends, love, memories, occasions, people, wkesp, work
- (0) Comments
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
