Sup3rnality

One of the first things I did right after I swung my legs to the side of the bed, planted them on the floor, and got up to walk, was to turn on my laptop and checked my e-mails. Yes, I'm that far gone and that deep in the technology quicksand. But hey, when you think about it, I live in Cyberjaya and it promotes all sorts of cyber-ness--even if it is not as cyber-y as it sounds--and in spite of that, is disconnected from the outside world. So yeah, being where I am I should be living my life ITly and also because the internet is my saving grace to ensure I don't spiral into a black hole of loneliness.

Anyway, I digress, so back to my story. On top of my unread mail was my daily Whedon.info digest, with consists of anything and everything recent about and connected to the Whedonverse which is condensed into clickable links. The links itself are the headlines, so you can click on them headlines to be directed to the article itself and read on.

I stopped dead when I saw
""Buffy The Vampire Slayer" Movie Remake - It’s more than a rumor".

I clicked. And I read on.

My reaction?

Hell, NO.

A Whedonverse without the man, Whedon, himself?

Hell, NO.

There is no room for discussion. No room for reasoning. No room for debate.

I'd rather have no BtVS than have no Whedon. I know that the 'verse that Joss had painstakingly created would be shattered to bits. We've seen it done before in the first movie. And it sure as hell ain't surprising if it happens again.

I mean, the movies now are full of remakes. And I've seen many of my childhood favourites destroyed one by one. My memories now marred by some so-called new take or angle of a once popular show. Their "revolutionary" ideas on how it can be made 'contemporary' ruining the very essence of the show. I've seen it with Alvin and the Chipmunks, Ninja Turtles, Transformers etc. And then there was Indiana Jones 4 and Terminator 3. And how bout them stories like Dragonball and Streetfighter? I'm not a fan, but even I know those two were terribly butchered.

So a BtVS remake but in a different timeline so to not touch the world Joss created?

Hell, NO.

The beauty of the Whedonverse is that Joss builds the legends and myths and history around his stories tightly. So one pull at a strand can unravel this carefully woven, complex world. So it should not be touched. Not unless Joss intervenes. Others may think differently, but in my opinion, Joss is canon. What he thinks out will flow into the myth. It's his myth, after all. And someone else attempting to have a shot at this myth without having Joss be a part of it is murder to that myth. A different timeline might seem to be a way to go to tell the story of Slayers from another angle so to avoid probable contradictions, but I think this is not bloody likely to be the case.

The way I see it, seeing from how there are so many remakes made and being made, alot of people are wanting to jump onto this lucrative bandwagon. All you've gotta do is choose one of the many classics, unearth them, and make them "new" again to gain new fans and interest. And with Whedonites still going strong, there seems to be a market for a new BtVS movie. But a new BtVS movie by someone other than Whedon and his team (think Espenson, Noxon, Minear, Greenwalt, Goddard, DeKnight, Fury and Petrie) and a different timeline? Hell, no. Them bloody "revolutionaries" will rake in the cash and live happily every after, while the stories lie in the dust, doomed to forever be another classic that shoulda stayed buried because they're too cheesy or lame. No young'uns, it's not that. You see, they shoulda been handled the way they should be handled: with care. Their original creators went through much pain making them the way they are; but then some person comes up and thinks they know better cos they're young, and hip and now; but ends up rattling the foundation of the story. And thus, the story slumps in a heap and is forgotten. Never to be revisited again, because everyone will now remember it as a flop. And not for the greatness it once posessed.

So, please, Joss, don't let this happen.

I can see no good coming from this unless you step in.

This is the time for your divine intervention, Joss Whedon.

JWIMMN,
Linzy

I just came back from the post office, went there to send in my payment and photograph to IIUM for the commemorative book for the Class of 2009. It struck me just how not long ago I was just walking the hallways of the IRKHS, going up and down the Batu Caves stairs, getting to classes on time, and living in a college. It wasn't that long ago.

What, it's been like, 6 months ago? Half a year? The number sounds like quite a few, but it wasn't that far back that I had trudged to the maze-like pathways of IIUM. And now I am working, earning my own living, paying my own bills, have my own car which I am paying for, and just surviving day to day by my own means. Where has the time gone?

Because, when I think about it, it seems like a lifetime ago.

It's funny, to think that it feels like only yesterday, but it also feels like it happened to another person, in another life. It's unexplainable.

As I sat eating my lunch and reminiscing, some memories come flooding back:

• 25th May 2003, 6 years to the day, my family and I, drove from Shah Alam to Section 17, Petaling Jaya, where the Holy Grounds of the Matriculation Centre, UIA, stood. As soon as I entered the AMF, I asked myself "What have I gotten myself into?". And the first person I talked to in UIA was rude and a snob. Hmmph.
• Meeting Zaza, my first roommate in UIA. We both were so innocent then. I remembered Zaza in her baju kurung and big, slip-on tudung, as we made our way to the topmost floor on the Zainab college.
• Had a horrific ta'aruf week. My shoes were uncomfortable and melecet in a dozen places. Hardly had the time to bathe or wash clothes, so we wore the same baju for a week. Had no time for food, so I went hungry on most days. And on a day that I did eat, I got food that had gone bad, and also had a soya bean drink that was already basi.
• One time, I almost left the room topless, and I have no idea how, but I put on my tudung and forgot my top... Thankfully Zaza was in the room to stop me.
• After ta'aruf, not having seen guys for a week, I went out with my friends and was half-drunk by the sight of guys walking in the street. I wound down the window of Iylia's car and waved at any cute guys passing by in.
• Meeting Julia for the first time. She connected me to the rest of the BENdit crew, so I remember her most of all. In the dingy classroom underneath the restaurants, I turned around to the girl behind me whom I heard Ms. Adlina calling 'Julia', and asked her whether she was 'Julia' and whether she knew anything about being exempted from taking English, since I saw her name on the list.
• I remember my camaraderie with my roommates, the actual ones and the extended ones. There was myself, Zaza, Kak Ziana, Shikin, Nurul, Halem, Ira, and Liyana. Imagine the tiny ZC room being stuffed with double the number of people. But we had good times. Like that time on Shikin's birthday and her brother (also Nurul's boyfriend) bought her a Secret Recipe cake. The frosting tasted weird, so we scraped it off and had a food fight. Oh, and that time when I did not realize there was a bowl of yong tau foo on the floor, and I jumped down from my top bunk and right onto the plate. You would not believe the extent of the splatter of the soy sauce. It went high up the wall where I could not reach to wipe clean. It splattered on my roommates' clothes and towels, and notice boards, and books...but not in the slightest did it touch mine. It would seem as though I was trying to sabotage their things... Thankfully, Halem and Nurul were in the room as witnesses.
• How we all (BENdits) trooped into an empty classroom and took a marker pen we found and started writing things about UIA that we didn't like. Sarah was the one doing the writing... and when we have written too much, and wanted to erase it, only then did we realize that the marker was actually permanent. We crossed out what we can with the marker pen...and hurriedly tried to leave the scene of the crime...that was when Sarah yelled "Fingerprints!", and proceeded to wipe the board :P It was a laugh riot.
• Our Lepak Place. It was a very comfortable group pow-wow nook that we went to eat, joke, talk, sleep... But the important word here is "comfortable". It was such a nice place to be in between classes and just have some like-minded company share a laugh with you.

There are so many things that I can talk about, and thus far, I've only covered a part of my experience in Matric. I haven't even gotten to the main campus... I could fill a book. But for now, this is it.

Can't believe that it has already been 6 years since the day.

Love,

Linzy

Once again I find myself in this rut of a situation:

Apartment hunting.

Apartment hunting in Cyberjaya is a pain.

The operative word here is “Cyberjaya”.

Why? Because of these following factors:

• It is mighty expensive. One room, even a single or middle room, depending on whether or not it is furnished, can reach to about RM500. And I'm only talking about the standard furnishings. Some supposedly fancy ones can go up to RM600+. And myself here, am looking for a master bedroom, which could be between Rm450 to Rm900. Crazy right? Even at it's cheapest, around RM450 (that is if you're very very lucky and grab it fast before anyone does), it's enough to pay the rent for an entire flat, or a cheap terrace house anywhere else. It's outrageous, the price. And we are talking about just one room here.
• Most apartments have mixed gender housemates. Liberal as I am, I am not partial to having male housemates. A little hypocrite, yes, but living in a house with a guy stranger means not being able to come out of my room without enough coverage. And for people who don't know me, that pretty much means covering up. I may be liberal, but I am not comfortable with dressing only partially in the presence of males. And then, not to mention how dangerous it iss to have an unknown male living under the same roof. Not that I do not have faith in the goodness of the human race, it's just that they do not have my complete faith. I don't want to be caught up in a situation whereby something happens to me whilst alone in a house with a guy, and then I can't say much because not only is it wrong to live with a guy like that, but it will be considered by people to be asking for trouble... so, best not take the risk. Although, at this point of desperation, I can hardly care anymore. But my parents oppose the idea, so, all the more reasons not to. Ash, though, prefers the idea of having a guy in the house for the sake of safety. I agree, but then, like I said, my parents won't allow it, and I'd hate having to feel uncomfortable in my 0wn house.
• The race factor. Yes, I'm speaking of difference in ethnicity and nationality. Not to be racist and whatnot, but, first of all, most of the people who post up room-for-rent adverts, state a preference of race, thus minimizing my options. Also, foreigners tend to ask for more, with their asking price for rent from around RM700 to RM800. And cultural/religious differences also come to play. Most foreigners here are fond of parties and alcohol; thus making them an unlikely candidate for housemate-dom. Especially if said parties and alcoholic beverages are had within the premises of the home. Locals, on the other hand, and the Chinese in particular, aren't very comfortable with races outside their own sharing a house. I've been turned down many times by those who wanted Chinese housemates only. Which reminds me, if they only want Chinese housemates, they should not write "Preferably Chinese" in their ads. It's misleading as it gives off that hope that yes, the would prefer a Chinese, but otherwise, any other race would be fine. If they didn't want any other race living with them, what they shoulda stated was "Looking for Chinese housemates only". Grrr... And then, there are the Malays. My own kin, to put it one way, eventhough I don't really care much for the race you are. When it comes to Malays, I am ever-wary of living with them, and would prefer to meet them if beforehand, before making the decision of moving in with them. I dread them busy-body types who barge in on your business. I am a relatively sociable person, but I like my space as well. And my space is mine, so don't come walking in uninvited.

So yeah, those are where the pain lies. Other than the usual requirements, ie peaceful and quiet housemates and them minding their own business, the factors above are what that is making it so hard to find a place. Minus all that, especially the gender and race factor, finding a house is pretty much a snap. But no, they hinder my getting a place...and thus, I am stuck in this rut.

And the worse thing is, my landlady who says she wants to take over the house sometime mid-year, has yet to confirm exactly when this will be. It puts us all in a tough situation not knowing when we need to get out. Especially since I'd rather stay than go... I don't mind paying the hefty rental, provided that I don't have to move out for the next few. Sheesh. This woman sure is inconsiderate. I mean, she has to give us a month's notice at least, and she has yet to do this. So if she expects to move-in in June without letting us know, she's in for a world of trouble.

In a rut I am.

Love,

Linzy~

My prayers be with Anis and Matt and their son, Faris.
May all turn out well in this test of His.
InsyaAllah, all will be fine.

Be strong.

Love,
Linzy

Sayang,

Happy 24th Birthday!
And many more wonderful years ahead.
I can't wait to see you.

Love,
N.e-Q

Surprise, surprise.

I, for the first time in the history of Hazlin, drove to work. And yes, alone. I did it all by my lonesome; and I didn't even have to push off at 7am to get there at 8am like Ash said :p

Alhamdulillah, I arrived safely without any incident or fuss. And I hope it stays that way now and always. Yay! I'm so proud of meself.

Maybe it's no big deal to another person, but I last drove many many years ago. Starting to drive again these past months was pretty much like starting from scratch. I had to really brush up on everything, which to be honest, seemed to be like nothing; meaning that, it's not I had anything to brush to begin with. And I haven't been on big roads...so this morning I pretty much felt nervous as I was about to turn the corner into the main road.

I couldn't even sleep last night. I was tossing and turning and worrying about driving today. All kinds of worry sped through my mind. And I kept getting up in the middle of the night to check on the car. I, after all, am my father's daughter, and I'll get worried and paranoid about everything. A little bit OCD, I suppose. Even this morning, after parking the car and all, I checked the car several times to make sure it is all locked up. And even as I am typing this, I glimpse out the window ever so often to make sure the car is still there. It might just be for the moment, or it could be a lifelong thing like my father :p

Speaking of my father, I hope my parents won't worry too much. I don't want them to not be able to sleep at night and worry 24/7 about my driving on my own. I know they worry cos they love me, but I don't want them to stress themselves out doing so. I should be ok...

But anyhow, my first experience of driving independently went good. All I could pray for is that this continues to be so til forever. And that I do not run in with reckless drivers.

Now, InsyaAllah my driving back would be just as smooth.

Love,
Hazlin

After having worked here in Wolters Kluwer Enterprise Services Partners (WKESP) for three months, now, I thought it is time I gave you all a glimpse into my daily life here. Yep, my everyday in WKESP, Cyberjaya. A little tour, if you will; since I can't actually take you around. Well, okay, fine, it's not like you asked to be shown around to begin with but humour me, would you? I enjoy the mundane aspects of life and always find they are worth a little story-telling. So I shall now be giving anyone with the time to read a (hopefully) short written/visual tour of my quaint office on the fourth level of FSBM Plaza.

So we begin at the lobby of WKESP, as can be seen in the picture on the right hand side. This is where I've sat anxiously waiting to sit for the test the first time around, and for the interview the next day. Now I pass it daily without a quiver of uncertainty as I enter and leave the office. Fatimah, who sits at the reception desk is the friendly face who meets and greets all that come through WK's glass doors. And besides that, she also receives my parcels for me... Always wondering what exactly I am doing with the Poslaju deliveries I get almost weekly.

And if you wals down the path from this reception, you shall be going deeper into the inner sanctum of the green-themed office. You'll pass by Jason's office on your left, and then you'll come to a juncture at which you'll see the multi-purpose room, mainly used for big meetings and gatherings, Mount Fuji, which, true to its name, is super-cold. If you turn a left, you'll pass by Sunita, who is the GM, and Raymond's offices on your left, and the Training Room on your right. Then straight on, you'll enter one side of the office, where the Asia Teams and the NZ Team reside, as you can see from the picture on the left.

If you were to go straight past the Mount Fuji room earlier instead of turning left, you would pass the emergency exit, Ladies' Room, Cleaner's Room and the Men's Room on the right. And you will have to turn left and arrive on the other side of the office, where all the Australian Teams reside. But first, you'd pass the board room on your left, where I have weekly meetings with my team, Australia B - Tax and Accounting.

Standing at the point with the Boardroom on your left, you'd see the view as in the picture <----. You'd see this aisle that seems to go on and on, acting as a great divide between Australia C, which is the group of desks on your left side, and Australia B which is on the right side of the picture. If you look closely, about three desks away from the viewfinder of the pic, there is a woman intently looking at her monitor whose table is the one next to the pillar; that is Carol, and I sit at the desk just before hers, the second desk. Yep, that is my humble abode in the WK office. But it is also the most non-strategic place, cos it's situated at the aisle where people walk back and forth and see what in the world you're doing on your PC. In my case, it's my online shopping which is my eye-candy between tasks, when I need some relax time. Not to mention it is un-strategic cos it's near the boardroom. So when we have visitors and the like, they can pass by and have a peek at what I'm doing. I was particularly worried when they had the head honchos from Netherlands here and taking pictures. I thought they'd surely be taking pics of my non-work. But instead, on that day, they took pics of me stressing out at Zul's desk, worrying about Denise's blunder with ABAG 145 ;p

So here's my work station... It's still a little bare from my not having put up much besides some notes and reminders. But it's now definitely more of a Hazlin-like place with my literature books on one corner and my organized clutter here and there. Charmander was sitting on my keyboard while waiting to be brought back to my sister as you can see... Other than him, my usual necessities line up in the picture. My mug of tea, a tumbler of water, my Victoria's Secret body butter, a box of tissues and my tracking sheet for each product I'm doing. Also, if you can spot it, my headphones lie behind my mug, from which I listen to Tori/Jewel on constant replay, and just behind my yellow tumbler, you'd see a square piece of paper pinned to the green divider. That's an acrostic poem that my Sayang wrote to me early in the year when I was feeling sad at not being able to see him often. I put it up next to my monitor so that when I look up at it, it serves as a reminder to me to keep smiling even when the going gets tough, because it reminds me that out there I have someone who loves me nonetheless and is willing to wait for me :)

Anyway, let me digress abit and introduce you to my teammates. There are currently 16 of us on the team: Arvind (TL), Aravind (SE), Tham (SE), Saiful (SE), Maryann (PE), Helen (Senior PE), Caroljit (SE), Zul (PE), Alan (SE), Sharina (PE), Ling Ling (PE), Adrian (Senior SE), Siew Choo (PE), Nubly (SE), David (PE), and myself (SE). When I started at WK, Lin was our TL; but as of April, due to Lin's promotion, Arvind who was and SE from Aust C previously, moved up and became our TL. And if rumours are true, we will soon have a new addition, a PE maybe, next month. We don't have a complete team picture cos so many people come and go, so the last team picture I found is the one above. But even then, some of those in the pic has either left, or changed positions. So if you look closely, the ones with the red dots above their heads are the ones still with us. Lemme introduce the ones with the dots: Top row (L-R) - Helen, Tham, Siew Choo aka Cheese Terrorist, Ling Ling, and Carol. The girl in the middle who wear glasses and has her hair tied is our former TL, Lin. Bottom row (L-R): Adrian, Alan, David and Nubly. The guy next to Adrian, the one is checkered shirt is Charles, who is now a trainer. Since this team, there has been many additions and changes. For example, these two on the right: Maryann and Zul who joined WK about 6 months before I started... So they are still relatively new. But they're PEs and our team haven't had a new SE in the longest time. So myself was the first SE in almost a year, and then Saiful was added to the team. And now we are all a bunch of laugh riots who, despite being one of the busiest team in WK, are the friendliest, funniest bunch ever. Which is why I love my team so much. We have a nice intimacy, and teamwork spirit going on which makes working very pleasant. I remember when I just started, everyone was so eager to make me feel welcomed.

Speaking of newbies, us newbies had our picture taken for the purpose of putting it up on our eCLS (employees come loose) message board. And of all the days they wanted to take the picture, it was the day when I was in malas mode and just grabbed a baju kurung to wear to work. So unglamorous. It wasn't a day when I was up and about in my dresses, so I ended up looking extremely comot and frumpy at that.

But anyhow, I didn't really care but I just hope they take down the picture soon since newer newbies have come in since the four of us (Ann, Juliana, Saiful, and myself). In the picture above, from left to right is Ashwin and Malar (I think), who are both on the IT team, and then Xiou Ann, Juliana and myself, the trio who is always up to no good with our online shopping and daily fashion shows. The three of us have made WK into our personal runway with either one of us having a new top or dress to put on each day :p And finally we have Saiful who is happily sitting down with women surrounding him. But Saiful's married, so Charles' comment on the pose went unheard.

But the three of us production newbies; Ann, Juliana and I now form a little group of people who congregate daily for laughs and blogshopping finds and gripes. We have bonded over our love for clothes and our rapport with one another that we will always be seen together. It's nice, to have your own crowd to get together with a few minutes during work just to take the stress off every now and then.

Anyway, back to the tour, we end it with the very heart of WKESP, the ePub. This is where the life of the WK is. The ePub is at the very center, and is the centre for mass gatherings and monthly general meetings. This is also where eat and socialize, because it works as a sorta lounge and/or dining area.We have our sink dish/mug rack on one side, the water and beverage dispenser on another. There are fridges, microwaves, a multitude of teas and coffees and sugar and creamer for us to brew our drinks to our liking and 2 tins of biscuits for us to chow on. We meet here for team lunches/gatherings/parties or to enjoy lunch together or do our work (especially for PEs) or read the paper or magazines. This where all the watercooler talk goes on.

And so we end the tour. But wait, what exactly does my work here entails, you ask? Well, I know you're not asking, but hey, humour me futher, I'll be done soon.

I managed to dig up this info in the shared folders drive:

"The sub-editor is responsible for project managing product updates and ensuring that the sub-editing and content tagging of publication data is of the highest possible quality. This means that they liaise with the editor and the indexer over the content that is to be included in the product update. The sub-editor is also responsible for providing a detailed handover to the production editor after the content of the update has been released for publication. They work closely with the production editor to ensure that the electronic and print components of an update and cleared to schedule".

General responsibilities:
· sub-edit for sense, grammar and literals by inserting queries in comment tags
· changing quotation marks to the curly quotes
· checking structure of the content, ie heading levels
· check tagging if text is converted by the PE
· insert tagging and check tagging where content is authored within Sigmalink by the editor
· spell checks
· resolve links
· check for broken links and redo links that have failed
· check graphics
· check tagging of tables
· insert queries where required
· remove all comment tags
· clean-up content before dragging the content to the editor for feedback on queries once external reviewer has made comments
· clean-up content based on comments
· accept/reject changes
· preparation of job tracking sheets
· general communication with production editor, editor and indexer on update
· insertion of CCH citation

So, that's it. That's what it is to work as a sub-editor here in WKESP, Cyberjaya. I am so far enjoying the work I do. It has its ups and downs, but the atmosphere, the people, the team, the friends, the kinda work I do all makes it a great place to be in. I'm happy here. I think this is a good place that will definitely help me in going further in my career, I'm earning a good sum, am surrounded by good people and overall happy. There are the downs like being too far away from my Sayang, my family and my friends, but hopefully soon, with a car, it wouldn't be that hard. So I don't regret my decision to pursue this place like crazy. It's definitely worth it.

Love,
Haminudin

No, I don't literally mean you on me.

Gutterhead :p

Due to the fact that the purpose of this blog is for me to have an outlet, and not really for the purpose of people actually reading it; I doubt that there'll actually be much response to this. But I saw it posted on a friend's FB notes, and I thought it's rather cool. You might find out a little something about your friend you never knew before. So I'm just pasting this here for the fun of it. If anyone happens to come upon this entry, no worries, no pressure. I just thought it'll make a nice filler to my long spaces in between entries. But if you reply, that's fantastic :)

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1. Who are you?
2. How long have you known me?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. Did you ever had a crush on me?
5. What do you think of me?
6. Describe me in one word.
7. What was your first impression of me?
8. Do you still think that way about me now?
9. What reminds you of me?
10. If you could give me anything what would it be?
11. How well do you know me?
12. When's the last time you saw me?
13. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't/shouldn't?
14. Ever wished to hug/kiss me?
15.What is my best attribute/characteristic?

********************************************************

If I could answer these myself, I might just. I just love these questionnaires :p

Love,
Hazlin

A nice, cool shower after a long day.
Falling asleep on a soft bed amidst pillows aplenty.
Being wrapped in blankets.
Feeling the cool breeze blowing on my face.
Watching Whedonverse episodes.
Curling up on my chair with a book or magazine.
Sleeping in on mornings.
Staring the rain falling and the smell of rain.
Looking up at a star-filled sky.
Watching the sun setting in the horizon from my office window.
Long car rides.
Talking a leisurely stroll.
Returning home after a long day's work.
Tucking in to a mugful of green tea.
Reading poems.
Being awake late into the calm night.
Waking up on a cool, pleasant morning.
Your jacket that you left.

These are some of my simple, inexpensive pleasures. My comforts.

But nothing compares to being able to see you. And I want to see you so much.

I miss you.

Love,
N.e-Q

I was suddenly overcome with a wave of various emotions as soon as I got Anis+Matt's message announcing the arrival of their son. It was a mixture of amazement+awe+happiness accompanied by wistfulness, and an indescribable rush of emotions. So much so that I felt my eyes welling up, close to tears.

Not unlike my reaction when I found out that Anis was pregnant.

I am happy. Thankful. Syukur, Alhamdulillah. Anis has safely given birth to a healthy baby boy via C-section. I am grateful to Him that they are both safe...

It's such a beautiful thing that words cannot describe. Isn't life such a wonder?

Love,
Aunty Linzy

P/s: Anis+Matt's Little Knight shares a birthday with my brother :)

Happy Birthday, Hazrein Iman.
Happy Birthday, Yumi-san.
Happy Birthday, Little Knight.

It started with Juliana turning to me in the lift as we were leaving the office and asking "You nak balik cepat ke?", and I told her there was nothing I was rushing to, cos it was not like I had anything in particular to do at home. Other than a bunch of laundry, there is nothing that needs my immediate attention. So she pointed to her wrist, where her watch was loosely hanging. She wanted to go to Seri Kembangan, to the Taman Equine Jusco to get her watch to fit better. I asked her why not we go to Alamanda, Putrajaya; since it was closer? She said she had these coupons for Jusco which will expire this weekend, so she wanted to use them. But then, she forgot them, so she had to go pick them up at home first.

So after that, off we went to Jusco. We were talking about lingerie sets all the way in the car, and I mentioned that Jusco has nice sets that I usually get. So we thought with the coupons in hand, we probably could get more for less, since I too, have been wanting a few. And I also said that I wanted to get meself some versatile pair of heels that I can pair with anything; and also perhaps I should get a handbag for my Mum's (my aunt, for those who do not know) belated birthday present. Yes, going to Jusco proved to be potential trouble.

So we got there, and yes, it was trouble indeed. I first zeroed in on the heels that I wanted in red...and I got those. But after second thoughts, I'll be giving it to my mother since she likes the bronze ones I've already got and she loves red. Then I browsed through the clothing section...and as much I would have loved to buy many clothes, but for the same price, I could get dresses online, so I should best be keeping that cash for my online splurges. Besides, I already am waiting for my dress from House of Allure, so I shouldn't be getting any more clothes for the moment. Although I did end up picking up a cropped denim jacket :P Only after having my fill of eye candy in the shape of clothes, I went to the lingerie section and picked up four sets. Yes, 4 sets. They were all so pretty... But I later managed to get myself to pick only 2...sigh. I was contemplating tha handbags for Mum, but found none that were nice, so decided to browse shoes again instead. I found that Cleef shoes were going for RM10 each, and with the coupons, they were only RM8... so I got myself two pairs. Yup, and the original intention was just to go adjust the watch strap :P

It didn't help that Juliana wanted to stop by the Vintage dress shop on the way back... Thankfully I started at a different rack first and didn't find anything that I fancied. Otherwise, I woulda picked the same one that Juliana picked and ended up with alot. I took one black one on an impulse, cos I didn't have anything that I liked, but wanted one anyway...and cos I did want a black dress. It turned out to be super nice... no regrets at all.

So I went back with my hands full. I fell asleep happy at having so many stuff :)

The funny thing is that I was never the shopper. I've always had very little allowance and I was very calculative with what I bought. Bajus, yes, cos I am a clothes addict. But even then, I never did buy much. And if I did, they were the uber non-expensive ones cos I a) like to buy new ones all the time, b) didn't see the point in paying so much, and c) preferred the non-branded ones. And for stuff like shoes and bags, it was only rarely that I buy them...

So to turn to this crazed shopper, albeit with inexpensive buys, is quite a wonder for me. What have I transformed into? I find it funny how fast a person can change. Half a year ago I was dependent on what my parents gave me, and I could hardly ever spend. But now, I feel liberated...and I think that is what that is triggering my sudden urge to fulfill the need to spend. But not to fret, I am not the type of person who'd not eat or cut corners just to be able to shop. I have savings put aside. And I pay all my bills on time. And I have money for food allocated. It's just that the extra cash I have to use to my liking dwindled faster comparatively to other months, and I used substantially more...

Ah well, I hope for better care this coming paycheck as I have to pay for many things now. Sigh, I should go on a clothes diet :p

Love,
Hazlin

When I arrived at my front door of my Cyberjaya home last night, there was a pile of broken glass scattered all over the porch. It striked me rather odd, since it did not look as though it was accidental. It seemed to me as though someone intentionally smashed a bottle against the grill of my front door... But why?

My first instinct was to tell me parents and Ash about it, but I didn't wanna my parents any unnecessary distress and worry, and I forgot to tell Ash altogether because I was half asleep by the time I called him. But anyhow...

Why would somebody take a bottle and smash it all over the entrance to my apartment? Was it done in a drunken state or in rage and my door was the one the person just happened to come up against and so became a victim of the person's unpredictability? Or was there some malicious intent in the person doing so? And even so, did they get the right house? I mean, just the other side is a unit with same house number only that it has a letter 'A' at the end (which Ash, too, mistook for mine :p). It really is odd to me.

The bottle, upon closer inspection, looked a little bit like a Livita bottle; but also not quite. It could also pass for a medicine bottle; but then I can't really tell from it having been broken into pieces and all. But anyhow, it smelled sickly sweet and was all sticky on the floor, with shards of glass dangerously littering the ground.

Could it have fallen from the upper floors or thrown even? It's possible, looking at how many of the occupants just love throwing all manner of things, even dangerous breakable things, from the top floor not caring about the people down below who might just get hurt. But then, it doesn't look like it felt. The position of the bottle and the way it is broken seems like a close range smashing...

Maybe my having to move is timely. I don't wanna be in an apartment that *might* be a target for something. Now, if I could just find an apartment to move into...

Love,
Hazlin

My mother and I were talking a while before we both went asleep, my father was out on rukun tetangga duty. We were laughing at the antics of our cat Hitam who was busy making himself comfortable on my mother's blanket; a guest who invited himself into the room and chose a spot without waiting for anyone's approval. And as we laughed, the subject of the story moved to a former companion of mine, Sawadikap, or Kap for short.

This year marks five years since his death, and yet talking about him still brings me to tears. I was saying how I don't believe in entirety the research that says cats are only affectionate to their owners as that is a survival instinct to ensure a steady supply of food. To some cats, maybe; but not cats like my Kap.

He was stalwart and true, a knight of a cat that never backed down from what he took to be his responsibility. His every-morning wake up calls at my bedroom door, escorting me downstairs and to my bus, his waiting at the gate for me to come home, walking me to my tuition teacher's house...all that and more. He was my companion, my friend, my protector...

My mother told me he waited everyday in front of the house on weekdays for me to come back from school; eventhough I was already in UIA by then...

And before he died, eventhough he was all bones and weak and almost lifeless, he waited for me...for weeks... And when I finally came back and called out to him, he came. He was waiting for me just one last time... He lifted himself up one last time to walk to me. And he never got up again once he collapsed in my arms. I held him for hours until the early morning's light, when he drifted away as his blue eyes bore into mine...

Sometimes, like tonight, as I cry at his memory, I think he's still waiting for me...

I miss him so much it hurts.

Love,
Hazlin

• Yes, Facebook has become overrated now that everybody is using it. So what? I don't give a rat's hairy ass that you were among the first to discover the wonders of Facebook or whatnot. That doesn't give you privs to diss all the Malays who have recently started using Facebook to make their pathetic life more meaningful. It's a free (cyber)world that everybody can use, so let them choose what they wanna do with it. If you don't like that set of people, then make your profile private/inaccessible etc. I find it to be a useful tool for me to keep in touch with the kinda friends who love to change their phone numbers every time they blink or those who are now living in countries beyond my reach. Does that make me guilty, too, cos I use Facebook along with everyone? If only a select few used Facebook then where's the fun in that? There'll be no friends to connect with and the activities wouldn't be as fun, and there'll be no one to tag. So, stop dissing people who you think are following fads and are making you uncool. Why don't you stop living since everybody is doing it and see how that treats ya.
  
• Dude, stop deluding yourself and stop calling yourself an alpha male in that self-important voice and all serious-faced cos you can't pull it off. Believe me, you're not. You're not man enough to say that. In fact, a real man won't even need to say that. You're just a boy with big words with no substance to hold yourself up. Lights on with nobody home. I'm sorry, but that doesn't impress me much. Get yourself a troll of girls who love such big talk, and leave us well alone. She says you're only as annoying when I'm around? Well, I suppose it's the only time when a girl don't fall at your feet cos you're so smart and instead challenges every word you say. Get off me and my friend, cos I don't think you can handle our minds. Oh, and while I'm at this, you got no right telling my friend what to wear and how to dress. Just cos she doesn't dress like them skanky girls you follow around in my friend's presence, doesn't make her unsexy. She's sexier being who she is, and not how you want to make her. Take her for the person she is, or leave her well alone.
  
• Stop being so stuck up, girl, cos one day you're gonna realize that you're on the losing end. There's more to life than what that has to fall under your preferences and your perception. The world was made to be diversified, not just the one ideal. The world wouldn't be half as fun if it were. Don't look down on the people you don't see fit to fit into your little world. Acknowledge people for what they are and what they choose to be like or choose to like. There is no one set mould. There is no type. We are all bits and bobs that fit into one another.
• Stop interrupting everything I say, Motormouth. I can never get a word in when you are around. You always have something better to say. You always have a better story to tell. So what? Wait your turn and let other people have a go. Don't jump in when people are mid-sentence or mid-story. It's rude and very hurtful. Stop it.
• Not wanting to generalize, but the foreigners living in my block are terribly dirty. Not all foreigners, but a certain few from certain countries. They seem not to be in the know of the existence of things called garbage bags or trash cans and anything of the like, the things where you put the trash in. It seems so because they never know where to put their trash. They throw all manner of things out the window. Shoes, files, old books/magazines, bottles (glass and plastic), clothes, and anything else they could fling out the window litter the ground outside my window. And being on the lowest floor gives me the luxury of hearing all of that bouncing off the pavement. Oh, and the kitchen window? Well, as mentioned, I'm the one located closest to the ground, so the ledge outside the kitchen is full of old styrofoam boxes gone moldy, stale bread, food that has gone basi and all foodstuff or relating to it. And yes, I've seen the faces of the kinda people who throw them. And yes, the locals do it, too, but there is a certain level of decency to their doing so (if there can be such a thing). I don't care la, foreigner or not, whatever race; just be clean. We all wanna live comfortably, so stop being so goshdarn filthy.
  
• Stop being holier than thou.
• Please please please please please please please please please don't cancel Dollhouse. Don't do this to Joss again. Don't let another Firefly happen.
  
• Something must be done about the cabbies in Cyberjaya who not only not use the meter, but charge twice the fare to head to one's destination. One cabbie who was a newbie used the meter cos he didn't know the route and I saw that the real fare to get from Cyberia to FSBM Plaza was about RM4.50. I've always known it was much lower than my normal 7 or 8 bucks but here I had the proof in plain numbers. Just cos people here are willing to fork out that much cash doesn't give them the right to charge however they like. Come on la, we don't all have a pocketful of cash.
• Why hasn't my gaji come in yet :(

I didn't after all.

My team leader, Arvind, didn't let me.

He told me to stay home and get some rest.

Sheesh, never thought my superior would tell me to stay home and laze instead of doing work :P

So I'm here at home, listening to Tori's American Doll Posse at max volume.

And waiting for my laundry to get done.

I'm bored.

I wanna be subbing ABAG.

:p

Love,
Linzy

There's a reason why they used to call me The Responsible One.

Situation (right now):

It's 10.30am, and I am at home in bed, still in my nightie, and obviously unshowered. I am coughing and sniffling and have tissues littering the floor next to my bed from having sneezing all night, but was too caught up in my sleep to get up and throw them in the bin at the far corner. I have that heavy feeling in my noggin and it makes getting up from my pillow feel like torture (a little more than the usual).

In cases like these, there is no other thing that I could do but to just stay home and recover. But the Annoying Responsibility-Addict+Ever Constant Guilty Conscience in me is feeling bad for not being at work. I feel like I should be there to at least do something, even if there is nothing needing my immediate attention. I feel guilty for being here at home doing nothing in particular while my friends and colleagues are in the office slaving away doing what they need to do. I feel useless.

If responsibility was a disease, then it musta been something I've contracted and never recovered from. As I am typing this, I am actually contemplating going to the office after lunch time. I cannot just sit around and laze. Especially not when I am alone with my guilty thoughts and fighting my conscience that says go to work while logic says, get some rest. Haih...

After much thought, I think I will be going to work.

:p

Diseased with Responsibility,
Hazlin

Be forewarned.

Never be fooled by the deceiving, nonchalant expression of Sarah's face.
The woman is the devil.

Sarah just came up with the most scandalous ideas.
But admittedly hot!
I mean, sizzling.
And they have just piqued my interest.

I might just jump in headfirst.

*evil grin*

Love,
Linzy

I am very very hard to anger. And in the event that I do get pissed off, then it must be something big. And one of them is betraying my trust. And the betrayal of that trust sits high up there at my boiling point anger scale.

I was super-pissed at my housemate today. Fuming. If it wasn't for the fact that I've known her for many years and that I know her family very well, I would have said more. But I didn't. Because, well, I hate getting angry. And I hate yelling. And I hate yelling at people.

I was at work, busy juggling my seven products when I got a text message from my housemate. The text began with an apology, and an explanation on how she had used the master key to open my room to use the bathroom. I was still okay at that point. And then I read on. She said her sister's apartment had no water. And so she opened up my room for all her sister's housemates to use my bathroom. I was so angry I had to stop and close my eyes and take a deep breath. I felt like throwing my phone in anger.

Seriously, what the f*ck?

You open up my room and let strangers in? I may know her, and I know her sister, and even then, I would still be angry if it was only them who used my bathroom. And she didn't even have the decency to call me first and ask my permission. She said they were late for class and had no choice. Screw that. A simple phone call or text message would have done a world of difference.

This is the thing, woman. Opening up my room without my prior notice and my permission, is the same as you breaking and entering into a person's house. I don't care if I know you, and I don't care that you hold the master key; but unless it was a life or death emergency, you have no right to open my room. Let alone let strangers in. They came into my room, had the freedom to see and touch my things and steal if they want to. They came into my personal space. My privacy. My home. You have no f*cking right to it. I pay my rent, and I pay the bills and therefore it is mine. I say what can or cannot be done to it, inside it, or near it.

They came into my home and God knows did what. As far as I am concerned, you and they fall under the same category as burglars. Yes, I sympathized that they had no water, it happened to me too; but that still warrants no right for you to take out your master key and give them free reign to my room. No f*cking way.

If you asked, I would have still been reluctant, but at least you bothered to ask. But you didn't. And it didn't matter that you apologized after, it doesn't change the fact. You aided in the intrusion; and if this was a case real criminal case, I wouldn't hesitate to press charges against you as well. Too bad, woman. I really do like you, with the laughs and conversations we have. But my respect for you has dipped and my trust in you is nowhere in trustville.

I'm so glad you're moving out soon. Because I don't want to go to work fearing that you will decide to let everyone in next time in case they needed a place to sleep, or shower, or comb their hair. I won't have to worry about you deciding that you should open the door yourself cos I was sleeping and didn't answer when you knock. So please, nice as you are, you have been crossed off my trust list, so I'll be glad to see you go.

And the worse thing is? My curse is that I can never get mad at a person, so it's likely that these words, or the jist of them, will never meet air and get thrown in her face, cos I am just too nice. And sometimes I hate that.

Angered,
Hazlin

Once again, I haven't had much time to sit down and let my thoughts gorge down a huge feast and flesh out fully and proportionately to have much substance to pen down. So I shall just be jotting down some quick thoughts/musings/observations etc.

• I'm pretty conservative in my dressing, albeit my not wearing the headscarf, but modest anyhow. And I've never worn anything that shows legs. But today I found myself wearing a red, long-sleeved, three-quarter dress that stopped just a few inches below my knees paired with bronze two-inched wedges. So there was some leg show happening there. Just not much, since I am, well, short. And odd as it is for me to don such a get-up, I actually felt comfortable. Something a little different for a change. I still prefer jeans, though; but it'll be a great alternative to wear to work for a semi-casual/formal look.
• Today I topped my last record of being in the office for 9 hours. Today I stayed for 12 hours straight without leaving the office and having just a half an hour break for lunch. Thanks to last Thursday's eCLS outage for the entire day, and Friday being a holiday; my work has backlogged and I had to come in early and finish late to get everything done.
• I can't wait to get my car. Which will hopefully be in another 2 weeks or so. Perfect timing since Juliana is leaving soon. So I wouldn't have to worry about transportation and eating and the like.
• The more I think of it, the more I look forward to getting my Masters degree.
• I miss my Sayang very very very very very very very very very very very very much. I'm counting the days til I get to see you again...