Sup3rnality

(written for FidZy)

We don't talk anymore. So often now we sit next to one another without ever saying a word. In silence we would stay until I accept that he would not say a thing no matter how long I sit by his side. We do not talk. I'm not even sure he listens. So sometimes I leave. Leave him to himself; hoping on another day he'd talk to me.

Sometimes I stare deep into his eyes to see any trace of acknowledgement. Just hoping that he'd see me, to let him know that I'm there for him if he ever wants to talk. But he doesn't. He just gives me a smile that hardly reaches his eyes, let alone his cold heart. He doesn't talk. And so I go, perhaps another day.

He's so still. Unmoving. Stares off into space, thinking... Thinking thoughts that I know are not of me. I'm tired of this. Tired of trying when he never bothers to. Maybe there's no use coming around anymore. Waiting on a person who can't even turn his head to show you he sees you; that he cares. He's so cold. So I'll say goodbye.

I remember once upon an August, awhile since the trail was left cold; a voice came late at night seeking refuge. A voice I've not heard speak my name that way since the trail ran cold.

And I swear I thought it a dream. So sudden into sleep it came bidding my attention...and I wish I gave it that. Mind yawning too wide to hold in sleep. I forgot those wistful words for a yesterday. Forgot how it'd ached to think of posibilities but handed none. I forgot.

I do not remember now what passed for conversation that night. I can only wish I did. A hope to hold on to when even straws begin to crumble; a cruel whisper of warmth yet so cold when in night. But rather that, than the silence of vacuum.

Is it this I am supposed to hold on to? Or is it the comforts said in my ear when all was crashing like waves? Or the song on the other end of the line? Or is it the look I'm somtimes graced with...?

Tell me. Tell me now. Or will this familiar stranger call again once in an August?

Yours, Lin~

It is a slow burn to reach boiling point.
Heat turned on low, but burning bright.
Kindling flames stoking a raging fire.
I'm cold I say, but within ablaze.

Yours, Lin~

For those who've newly joined the world of humans, I would like to let you know that there is a difference between honesty and tact. In fact, not only is there tact, there is also a boundary of what can be said and what cannot. Even if you are friends with the person, it doesn't gives you the right to say all that is on your mind regarding them or their family. It is just not done. Only a person or alien stupid enough that can't see logic would do something so invasive. In the world where human beings reside, honesty is not necessarily the best policy as you dumbass aliens might think. Just because you read all about humans in a bunch of books about their lifestyles and habits doesn't make you a bloody pro. So don't think you're so smart. In fact, you know nothing. You don't learn about how to blend in with humanfolk from books, stupid. Reading a manual on humans will do squat for you. It's getting to know them that will teach you about them. Be a part of them. Feel what they feel. Do what they do. If not, what else would you do with that knowledge but quote from the book like a gorramn walking encyclopaedia that no one wants to listen to? And by the way, we human beings aren't stupid. Just because we don't speak the way you do doesn't mean we know nothing. You painstakingly explaning every single thing when really, we know them already; deconstructing it is an unnecessary redundancy. There's no need for that. We human beings choose not to insult our companions by implying that they are ill-informed through nonstop commentaries of every single thing. And then there you are explaining the mechanics of your spaceship when all we commented on were how pretty the paintjob is. No one wants to know, honestly. And by the time you finish with your litany, we human beings have forgotten or have gotten bored of it and are ready to move on. Really, save your breath, or whatever it is you aliens use to speak and breathe. I understand that you are an alien and therefore are in such a way that is different from us people. But since you've been complaining of wanting fit in within the human world, act like one. Don't apply your logic when the majority is human logic and then whine when you don't get your way. Being a human means being cogs in a wheel that helps the wheel turn. Not a pebble that lodges itself in the hollows and disrupt movement. So really, its either you be human or you get back to the planet where you came from and whine about it there. Not whine among us because you refuse to act human when you're trying to be human.

And anyway, to whomever yang terasa, that means it is for you. I don't like pointing fingers. But if you think it's you, then yeah... It is. Like the old Malay saying goes 'siapa yang makan cili, dialah yang terasa pedasnya', or, in Xander's words: "He who smelt it dealt it."

Lin~