Sup3rnality

*9.15am, Com Lab E*

My lower back is hurting like Holy Hell and I'm sitting on this low backed chair that so does not support my back. I'm in Lab E for com class and I am so not listening to the lecturer. Ugh, she wants to stop now. Will update later. She's gonna end the class now. Goodbye for now. Later then!

*8.33pm, ZCCC*

Continuation...

I’ve been finding solace in the stillness of the night. It calms yet also invite lots of thoughts. Sometimes I resent having these thoughts I my head; wanting my head to be unburdened by things I can’t change. But then again, it’s actually the perfect time to ponder on complex thing that I couldn’t possibly get myself to comprehend in the hustle and bustle of the daytime.
I’m back to my broody mood again. When I can find something like the grain of wood interesting. I can search for some kind of meaning to my life by just staring at the ceiling. I’m quiet these days because of that. Honestly I don’t know what I’m searching for really. Perhaps I’m looking for a way out of my confused state of mind. Or maybe I’m just thinking of what all this thinking would lead to. I don’t know. All I know is that I’m just hurting myself for trying to be the tragic hero or something of that sort of my life. Hmmph….

Sometimes I think I’m being to hard on myself for something that isn’t my fault. And maybe that is true. It’s easy to put the blame on myself and come up with theories of where I went wrong rather than contemplate the error of other(s). When the blame rests on me I can easily craft an explanation from my point of view.

Maybe I shouldn’t think. Maybe I shouldn’t psychoanalyze every thing, every word. Not everyone is that detail. Maybe I should just go through the motions and pretend that I am living.

Well, enough on me. I’m getting tired of thinking about myself and how I should haul myself out from this dark dungeon…So, Sarah and me decided to pay Mr. Abdel a visit. It’s been quite some time since we got to sit back and engage ourselves in a conversation with our cool lecturers. And so we did. Mr. Abdel has changed office ever since he demoted himself and so now he shares a room with someone else. We found him on the topmost floor where he was entertaining his son Ahmed who was cute. We talked a bit cos we didn’t wanna stay long. But I don’t know, perhaps it was just I; but Mr. Abdel looked very troubled. As though something was troubling his mind. He had the expression of that of a man whose thoughts was a jumble. I don’t know, perhaps it was just me.

We left Mr. Abdel and went a-looking for Madam Adlina. She wasn’t in unfortunately, so we made a beeline towards Miss Adibah’s new office, now that she is the coordinator, which was formerly known as Mr. Abdel’s office. She wasn’t in either, and so we headed towards the directions of our college. It turns out that Miss Adibah was in the college office signing outing cards. She was hungry so we decided to get something to eat. As bloody usual, ZC had nothing but some leftover crap to offer so we thought AC College might have something better to offer. After we got our food and sat down, Miss Adibah told us that she’s been down lately. She says that her roomie practically chased her out of their shared office. Apparently she asked the movers to just move the stuff and leave it outside, as though she was so happy to be at last rid off Miss Adibah. She didn’t give a damn if Miss Adibah’s stuff got stolen or something. As far as she was concerned, she got rid of Miss Adibah. Like what the F? I just don’t understand this kind of people. And to think you spent a whole lot of time together in that one same office. You’d think the 2 of you would achieve some kind of respect for each other. Bloody backstabber. People like that do not deserve friends. Although I do not know why she was so mean to Miss Adibah, I think it may be due to Miss Adibah’s promotion. If it is, I like to think that it’s no wonder she’s still stuck in that office; it’s cos she’s so unprofessional. People like that, I prefer to just ignore and let them stew on their own. They don’t need to get the satisfaction that they are hurting us. But poor Miss Adibah. She was so depressed that she didn’t eat. She’s such a nice person and yet people hurt her. It’s so unfair. And to make things worse, she hasn’t many friends here to talk to. So she’s stuck being sad on her own. According to her she tried looking for us to talk. Poor her. It’s just so sad that people ca be so mean. I hope that woman gets what she deserves for being so mean. What goes around comes around.

Well, this is where I’ll stop then. Too much ranting makes my head go all crazy. So, thank you. I’ll be here all week (but then again, I’m going back tomorrow so maybe next week then). Adios!