Sup3rnality

I found an old notebook with carefully written transcripts of messages and notes he wrote me many years ago, before there was a you and me. They were written lovingly, cursive and fluid, like calm waters flowing gently out in blue ink onto paper. Beneath his words were tiny scribblings noting the date and time his carefully-thought out expressions of affection reached into my heart to take it captive - a reminder of when each momentary breath was lost. There was a time when those words filled me with hope that I was indeed a desirable enough girl - in all my awkwardness and questioning uncertainty. Even long after the expiry of that relationship, I held on to his words in hopes of finding them whispered to me again - by him, by anyone.
I read them all. I let myself smile at the memories.
Then I tore them up.
I've long ago forgotten the words he once said to me...drowned by your sweet whispers, teasing jibes, gentle rasps, your endless supply of words that can fill me a for a lifetime. Adamant. Reassuring. Comforting.
I wish I could write down all the words you say that sets my heart to a staccato beat. But baby, you say them so often I remember them by heart. And I believe I'll hear you whisper them to me for a lifetime to come.